Into the jungle I go

It’s been an eventful last month.

Last week I took part in my first Battalion Mission Exercise, where our company of 90+ had a simulated battle over 2 days against 600 troopers. As OPFOR (Opposition Force) we’re meant to test our ‘enemies’ and ensure they’re ready for a war that’ll probably never ever come because well we’re Singapore.

You might be curious as to how a fake war would happen, but it’s actually quite simple. Laser-tag. It’s basically a glorified laser tag game that takes place in the jungle, but you still shoot blanks to simulate a real round being shot. It’s a little bit juiced up because you have different weapons, tanks driving around and artillery strikes being called in. But that’s pretty much the gist.

Now for what everyone is wondering, how was it? I can only describe it with vocabulary so Jared-like, it was a fuck-fest. On day 1 of the mission, we were meant to delay their initial onslaught into vegetation for roughly 2 hours, but ended up delaying them for over 5. This was not down to our ability, but rather their incompetence. The mission was meant to last 14 hours but ended up stretching to over 17 as they were unable to even complete half of their mission. It was a truly remarkable performance. 

Hopes were high for day 2, surely they couldn’t be worse on defence than they were on offense. They weren’t much better. The mission was set in the evening so we had a little bit of time to recover from the previous day’s mission where we only got to sleep at 5am in a crowded, mosquito-ridden training shed. However in an outfield setting, not having to dig a trench to sleep in is already a victory. We were meant to begin our assault at around half 5, before thunder and lightning struck and the mission was put on a safety pause. Very realistic, I know. This meant the mission was delayed and inevitably the time we could return to our Company line (bunks) was delayed too. We ended up bashing through different vegetation patches in the pitch black, unable to find their stronghold, before eventually stumbling upon them some 500m away from where they were meant to be set up. Once first contact was made it was as I mentioned before, a fuckfest. One so large it resulted in one trooper from our side fracturing a finger after dropping a rocket launcher and one sustaining a second degree burn to his hand through a pair of gloves after making contact with the enemy’s red hot rifle barrel. 

My biggest take away from the whole mission was that our army is truly prepared for just about nothing and that I hate wearing camo with a passion because my face keeps fucking  breaking out.

However, I return to the jungle next week for a field camp to cap off my training phase in which I am extremely likely to not only get anally abused but also come away with pimples and a horrible heat rash. Exciting times. But it’s almost Christmas, and although circumstances are not the best, I hope everyone who still bothers to read has an enjoyable one.